This is the first photo I publicly shared of me in a wheelchair. It was my second non-medical outing I had gone on since I lost the ability to walk normally in February. The very idea of people seeing me in such a vulnerable personal place was so anxiety inducing. I of course chose our town’s… Continue reading living out loud
This is the last photo I have me of me standing. I’ll be at the 2 year anniversary of becoming disabled February 5th. It’s still honestly hard to believe its been that long. When it all happened I wanted SO badly to believe this was just an insane terrible CRPS flare up. I don’t even… Continue reading pain is important
This may seem like a no brainer but I want to start this post out by saying that: just because you are disabled doesn’t mean your life stops. It may seem this way at first, especially when you first transition from normal able bodied person to disabled person. Everything changes so swiftly and everything seems… Continue reading Have Wheels, Will Travel: 10 tips for traveling when you are disabled
Its 6 am and I can’t sleep. My pain woke me up around 5 and its become abundantly clear that sleep and I are done for the night. My wheelchair sits diagonal from me while I lay in my spot on the couch and I realized a minute ago that I need to apologize to you,… Continue reading Dear wheelchair,
As I have shared before on this blog, yoga has been something I have loved for a long time. I “discovered” yoga at my last inpatient stay for anorexia back when I was 15. I ripped a sun salutation sheet out of a magazine and taped it to my wall, the only thing there besides some… Continue reading #spoonie yoga crew
If you are chronically ill than I think you will understand how small things can be HUGE deals. It’s funny that such minute things like leaving your home or being able to wear certain things or eat certain things can be so groundbreaking but when you are dealing with a body that does crazy stuff… Continue reading the new old me
A few weeks ago a brave friend admitted on instagram that she still struggles with wanting to be thinner even though she is “body positive“. She admitted several truths in her post that rang true to me, this one in particular spoke to me the most: “I think about my size more than I care to… Continue reading there’s no wrong way to have a body: body positivity, disability, & why it’s ok if you still feel fat some days.
I have been thinking a lot about identity and who we all become after chronic illness and pain has changed our whole existence. It’s been on my mind a good deal these past few weeks. As always, I began to write about this if only to sort out my own thoughts. Ironically enough two poignant blogs… Continue reading what if you can’t go back: musings on chronic illness and identity
Hey friends. If you follow me on instagram, fb, or have been reading my blog in the past month you may know that my 2nd ketamine infusion was VERY different than my 1rst ketamine infusion both in my experience at the hospital AND afterwards. I am still struggling with an immense amount of pain all day every day.… Continue reading being patient with my pain
I have been oscillating as of late between being ok with where things are at in my life and then all of sudden really not ok. Although I have been sick for a few years, things have taken a sharp detour off the tracks for the past 5 months and I am dealing with some… Continue reading learning the language of letting go.